tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937440665796042907.post6293492640748698325..comments2014-12-12T12:54:11.148-08:00Comments on Pages By Kathryn: Step 1: Admit the ProblemKathrynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16778551258054910641noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937440665796042907.post-87981833215235744942014-03-03T21:51:15.553-08:002014-03-03T21:51:15.553-08:00Thanks for sharing, Katy. I know it takes a lot of...Thanks for sharing, Katy. I know it takes a lot of courage to talk about your struggles so publicly, but it's a good feeling, isn't it? And besides that, I'm sure you are helping lots of people (like me) by sharing. I only set one resolution this year: "Love yourself" and honestly I still don't really know how you do that. I spent the first year or two post-divorce dating guys with no long-term potential because I didn't feel worthy of being loved by anyone who had it all together. One thing I learned a few years ago is that the more you are yourself around others, the more people are drawn to you. I promise it works. I spent a while only applying it to the select few I was willing to be myself in front of, but as I am learning to bring my walls down I find my list of real friends is growing. <br /><br />Once in therapy a few years ago, my counselor urged me to pick people out of the crowd - "those" people - the cute, blonde, skinny, well-dressed girls I was comparing myself to - and analyze the way I compare myself relative to that one person. "She must have lots of friends. Guys ask her out all the time. She is a lot happier than me. She has less in her life to worry about." etc etc..... when you really think about it, there's a really good chance that being thin and cute made her no more happy than I was at that moment, so then I couldn't really use my appearance as an excuse, could I? <br /><br />I have like 5 more things in my head but I don't want to write a sermon. Thanks for sharing, really. I am very interested to see you tackle this challenge in your life and hope that I can learn from it, too. And for the record, you are a gorgeous girl. I'm pulling for you!<br /><br />AdriAdrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13615755855566681052noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937440665796042907.post-58328895580637238582014-03-03T14:28:53.183-08:002014-03-03T14:28:53.183-08:00@ Emilio Z. How were you able to stop comparing yo...@ Emilio Z. How were you able to stop comparing yourself? Even when I've told myself to stop thinking that way, it just gets worse or I can still feel the emotions of those thoughts. Trying to distract my mind from them didn't help much either. <br /><br />@Chelsea Packer I'm glad we feel the same. I know that most people (especially women) feel like this a lot, but it's hard to remember that you're not alone. And I have the same thought about working out! It doesn't help that my room has huge closet mirrors and I can always see myself. Those are great Motivators! I think self-esteem issues always come down to the self and it's great to look outside. Thanks for the tip! :)Kathrynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16778551258054910641noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937440665796042907.post-75356172416761188172014-03-03T10:43:44.406-08:002014-03-03T10:43:44.406-08:00Geez Louise. I feel like you went into my head and...Geez Louise. I feel like you went into my head and wrote my feelings, but much more eloquently than I could have done. I have boxes of clothes that fit me two years ago, that I can't even kind of squish into, but I can't bring myself to throw them away or donate them, because somehow, my worth is tied to me getting back into my own pants. I have a gym literally steps away from my apartment, but I feel like I don't look good enough to exercise (I'm dumb like that). That being said, I have been working on my motivators. I have a family that needs me to be healthy, I have friends who want me to succeed, and I have myself, and I deserve to feel good about being me. I'm ready to be cute again. Thank you Katey. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15119286529704726263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937440665796042907.post-68978780215282703432014-03-03T10:24:55.133-08:002014-03-03T10:24:55.133-08:00Good post friend. For the last year and a half I&#...Good post friend. For the last year and a half I've been back to exercising regularly. At the beginning it was kind of frustating because i made the mistake of comparing myself to the rest of the people working out. "I should be running faster" "I should be lifting more weight" these were things i told myself often and make it hard for me to enjoy my workout. As time went by I've realized and found joy at not comparing myself to other and their progress, but rather focus on my own. Now going to the gym is pleasant and even fun.Emilio Z.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10996214885820949831noreply@blogger.com